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food for garbage flowers

by alex polise

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1.
adulthood doesn't feel good right now two competing worlds won't let me settle down i drew a picture of the world with me on the side but i'm separated from the world by eraser lines it's hard x4 two plus to care about what i've really got there are bags in my wardrobe i forgot that i've even got i want a duck to call my own that keeps my ducks in a row i want the sun come up on the right side of my nose it's hard x4 the fact of the matter x4 i've been told once or twice you can't take everyone else's advice so i walked away, and i didn't come back that day the sky outside was yellow like corn like it was about to storm so i put on my hat
2.
23 & creep 03:32
i sharpened my pencil i wrote out your name would you and i be the same? even though we've never even met would we do the same things with our hands? people tell me that it looks creepy but maybe you would validate me would you think it's weird that i'm writing you a song? or have you already written one for me, but the name you used is wrong it's ok, you know the real me now we can be friends, our genes tell us how i've always wanted a sister but a new brother will do for now a new brother will do for now a new brother will do for now a new brother will do for now a new brother will do for now dear new brother, i hope that you're nice. you look kind of weird, but so am i i know we may never meet, but this is my song for you it's called 23 and creep
3.
miss america 02:50
it's been too long since i've been home life has probably moved on who are my friends? what's the IRS? i don't belong here, and i don't know anything about there the core of my stability has vanished into thin air i think i'd hate it if i went home i think i'd hate it if i never went home wouldn't it be great if you came home with me? we could laugh about the things i used to laugh about silently avoid the bad things about the place that i grew up by moving here to raise our tribe of pups we wouldn't have to worry about paying for healthcare if things got bad the NHS is always there to care but we could live in the desert together and i'd feel whole again it's more than just my family i miss being accosted by aggressive people in the streets in big cities and the smell of rotisserie chicken in sam's club i miss long car rides, and those big green signs and seeing people that i love at random times and people coming to pray with me when i'm alone and would prefer to continue to be we could drive eight hours to some random location stop to see dinosaur poop fossils at some rundown gas station by our t shirts from the car wash that sells americana gear near where i grew up and i could get mad at america agin for being overbearing and religious and excessive i'd probably put on some weight which is something that i'd hate but that's better than being so far away that i've forgotten all the bad things and am stuck in an eternal daze where i miss america, the dumb land i grew up i miss america, the dumb land i grew up
4.
oat milk 03:28
i wanted you a long time ago, but you weren't around i looked for you everywhere in the supermarket in my town you say that it's crazy that i love you like i do i'm secretly hoping no one else knows you're nutty and you're smooth i've loved other milks before but i think i love oat milk more it's funny at 26 how my change in taste can be so drastic i've loved other milks before but i think i love oat milk more i used to drink you for fun with coffee on sunday afternoons now i think i'll try only drinking you i used to drink you for fun with coffee on sunday afternoons now i think i'll try only drinking you i've loved other milks before but i think i love oat milk more it's funny at 26 how my change in taste can be so drastic i've loved other milks before but i think i love oat milk more after drinking a tall, cold glass of you i realise x8 i'm oat milk too
5.
6.
doom 03:38
do i look at you how about a greeting or two how do i know you want your small hand in my hand? always out to prove i’m a mistakeless little wonder how do i know what others want me to do? baby girls gone blue looking hard for the obvious truths stretching in the cars a nice thing to do hiding from the truth functionally following through theres no handbook on how to balance the doom
7.
cherry 02:03
her name is cherry we just met and already she knows me better than you she understands me after 18 years you still don't see me like you ought to do maybe we could maybe we could maybe we could maybe we could maybe we could talk 'bout things if you was made of wood and string while i love her every sound i don't know how to turn you down and your thick and my patience thin and i got me a new best friend with a pickup that puts you to shape and cherry is her name and when i'm lonely cherry's there and she plays along while i sing out my blues i could be crying and you don't care you won't call me back, you're stubborn as a mule maybe we could talk 'bout things if you was made of wood and string you might think i've gone too far i'm talking 'bout my new guitar
8.
luke 02:42
luke's there, eyes all glass sat in the old church during mass walk along the leafy side road to his mom's i bet she don't know church wine i don't recommend i never believed i just wanted a friend we laughed all through on eagles wings we drank more booze, the floor got slippery i never saw god, but i saw luke's eyes bigger and bluer than the biggest bible maybe one day we won't get married in this church with david and katie and aric my dad likes to talk about how you got strong not the old dweeb he thought you was your mom brings up how we got along stayed after school to drink tea and talk
9.
black dot 02:24
harry's so clever you'd think it was beginners luck but actually it's a gift from god the one thing that he can't give up he tells me that he loves me so but for three days now i haven't seen him we passed each other in the hall last night and he said, "sorry for the silence, but i've been away staring at a black dot on a ripped out page when the calling comes, i get swept away i do love you but not when i'm staring at the page i do love you but not when i'm staring at the page i do love you but not when i'm staring at the page i do love you but not when i'm staring at the page"
10.
safeway 01:48
drunk with a latte in safeway i told the barista the wrong name i hope i don't run into anyone my mom knows i'm just here to get pickles and cheddar cheese and then i'll go drunk with a latte in safeway i hope the sheriff lets me get away when i get home, i guess i'll bake brownies from a box ellen will be on, and with my sweatpants on i'll do some squats my dad will come home and he'll want to watch the golf i'll fall asleep at 4pm hugging a cheeze its box.

credits

released November 20, 2022

mixing help & mastering by daniel hcw parr (the last whole earth catalog)
cherry was written & made famous by amy winehouse

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alex polise London, UK

A thin reed bending in the wind.

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